it is 11:47am and i still in my pj's. i have no energy to anything and actually i really don't have to do or go anywhere today if i don't want. how many people can say that? take that, dr. phil. WTF? i guess i had talk show turrets just then. a very rare disease for unemployed gay guys. brutal. i am only unemployed till april. easter bonnet snaps. i love jelly beans. actually, i don't like hollow bunnies. that is like candy for the poor and i also don't like white chocolate bunnies, eggs, or crosses. i do like when they pipe jesus christ on the cross with royal icing. sometimes the fudge packin' factory on the washington mall uses pretzel nuggets as the nails and real rose thorns for the crown. steve and dan own that shop. steve is a dirty top into pig play and water sports. dan is a big ol' bottom who is into preschool roleplay and his knickname on the lower cape may rainbow flags are people too bowling league is the lincoln tunnel. girlfriend, if she collected a toll for every car that went thru there, she would be richer than howard hughes. oh shit. i watched the aviator via netflix. cute. long. cate blanchett was fierce. cut. edit. print.
i moved my office up to room one in 309. some will understand that and some will be WTF in fiesta font. if i were a font i would have to say right now i would be escalido streak. that is just how i am rollin' up to this shit today. www.fonts.com so, i bought this shampoo this week and it called drama clean. so, i got all up in my grey gardens that is what i call my claw talon tub, p.s.
i lathered. i rinsed. i repeated that powerwash. i got fresh with my facial scrub. anyway, i think there is some leave extract in it. i started trippin' my face off and my rubber duckie grew horns and was chantin' some voddoo cult shit in hebrew. i totally jumped back and hit my head against the window pane and for a minute i thought i was going overboard the railing of a carnival cruise ship with my vodka gimlet in one hand and my kathie lee fruit basket in da other. well, i pulled my shit together and i was totally doin' a jett t. and i am not liscensed to teach that dance in n.j. we don't allow that dance in jangleville at all. but, mable jones sometimes has house parties in the summer under her cyprus tree and we drink moonshine, pop roofie dolls, and do the jett t till the rooster sing up the sun. back to the poo, so i washed my hair with drama clean and i went over to the brown room last night. i thought it was suppose to shield me from drama. i am going to keep this on the sweet n low for ya'll so i don't offend anyone. this is blog is suppose to be helpful and educational. so, i am going to give a tip. if you think that layering makeup on your face like wet cement is going make your eyes pop and your lipsticks don't always need to match your sweaters. pins are statement pieces. i know a lot of clowns that live for brick red blush. i fill the cracks in my walls with spackle not maybelline casper concealer. i should be working at the chanel counter at macys. i need to dial up my katie in montclair. see if she wants to do tea and crumps at diva lounge with ms. b brown. liquid eyeliner snaps. where are those cute greyhounds, daddy? the bottom line is you should not throw cheap makeup in glass houses and leave caddy to you husband. OH BY THE WAY HE IS GAY and i never knew people could be hollow like a marked down white chocolate bunny crying on the sale rack at CVS. i guess i feel like an asshole for believing that my shampoo would fend off drama. i gotta go now i am having a can of fruit cocktail for lunch. i was told the heavy syrup is made with kettle one. i hope i don't too boozey and pass out before general hospital.
oh by the way way gay, casper was a friendly ghost. BOO.
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