someone 'roof" ed my champ at the golden globes. i don't know if it was the boss or beauty and the beast aka mickey mouse rourke. he never forgot that i stole the show in wild orchid back in late 80's or was it 90's. i don't know but i woke up in drew barrymore's pool on a raft shaped like a watermelon on tuesday. yes, i missed 24 hours and superstars of dance. WTF. my left foot was in the pool the whole time so it looks like box of raisinettes. NOT CUTE. i think i may lose a toe nail or not. i have doogie comin' over to look at my talons in a bit. i was so upset that i made up for last night by having an extra helping of ina's apple pear crisp. i think jeffery tainted the fresh nutmeg with drano. i have been backed up since and i feel like i am dodging a wrecking ball every time i move my head. i don't care what anyone says some twat and i when i say that i mean a gentle pussy. i should be more clear. anyway, some bitch put down their nuvaring on my coffee table and left a ring on my imported oak table from malawi. it was gift from madge when she step n fetched david from a banana tree there. it was hard to get him to let go. kids from their have italian sausage fingers their. so forgive me if i have not been able to get to my office to blog. i am at LAX right now and I flying into A.C. I have to go a steam carpet cleaner convention at harrah's and i may go to the casino just to chain smoke winstons and put back a 12 pack of coors lights. CANS NOT BOTTLES. I am going to clearwater for the superbowl and I am staying at the kegs n eggs guesthouse. it is 340 a night with a keg in every room and an egg any style buffet with a fountain of ketchup and a toaster that shoots whole wheat 40 feet in the air. amazing race.
do you know how many licks to get to the center of toostie roll pop?
P.S. it is pet friendly. hello, peeps.
GO HAWKS GO. or is it crows? wait, eagles? or beagles? all the same animal bird or fowl?
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