smothered pork chops

i have and still want to write a book. ever since i was a little tater tot playing with matchbox cars and strawberry shortcake dolls i have etch a sketched the book sleeve bio of me, the perfect lady in waiting a quick modge podge of my life. grew up a latch key kid with homo tendencies, creative and was vaccumming and pledgin' the family work work since the age of 6, business school in upstate new york, The Culinary Institute of America "the best fucking one in the USA, actually,"
my shining moment being asked to on The Rosie O Donnell Show, took some time off to experiment with clubs and drugs, fell into a destructive relationship ditch which took five years with a dodgey compass and some weak twine to pull myself out of that tar pit...to be reborn a follower of the lord in cape may and give back to fight the evils of cancer and help small children and animals. Christopher Cleary is now living in his Philadelphia loft with his partner of 5 years with their two dogs and writing his memoir to come out in the distant future.
OH SHIT. I got a little craisins there and carried away with that..i don't think i even had the eye-hand cordination back in the 70's to even spell my intials let alone spew out that crap....blow big bubbles my mom always said..then you can fit more dreams in them. i just totally lied. i just made that shit up.i should start writing cards for hallmark. don't you hate it when you trying to find the perfect way to tell someone that there an asshole and you don't want it too fluffy with two many watercolor birds and turtles on the front....and then you don't want to be too comic strip where the person thinks your only kidding and that your really don't wish you never met them.
there is a market out there. ya just have to bitch slap it.